Intentions

I have the best of intentions. Thats about as far as it goes. I intend to do many things. Such as keep my blog updated, call family members, remember the little things in life. Thats as far as it gets. I cant seem to do them. Sometimes I dont remember. Sometimes I remember and then get side tracked.

I wonder if a vow is better than an intention. Hmmm. Things to ponder.

So.

I vow to keep my blog up. Yup. Sounds more convincing. I vow to spend the rest of my life with Jennifer. ( I say my life cause if I dont remember to take the trash out my life will be short lived , another intention). I didnt say I intend to spend the rest of my life with Jennifer. Well maybe I do say that now. Huh.

So here is a list of things I dream of or intend to do in the rest of my life:

• write a book
• build a cord wood house
• own my own business
• have children
• go back to college
• own a VW bug ( the old school style)
• own a Harley Davidson ( any kind, a harley is a harley)
• shave my head (yes like G.I. Jane)
• be happy with me
• stay sober
• enjoy life as it is
• live one day at a time
• be Peanuts Bubba Bean forever!!!

Now that is a rather lofty but achievable list I think. Kinda puts me in aww as I look back over it. Hmm. I am 30 and have lots I want to do.

I better work on the intention thing.

Life is a contradiction.

so. Lets see. This is what I know. (blank space lots of blank space) I know very little. I do know that I am right where I am supposed to be at this very moment in my life. I know that I got what I need when I need it not when I want it. I believe in a higher power. A being greater than myself. I chose to call that power God. I have my own perception of this being. This power guides me through my day. I humbly ask God for guidance everyday and thank him every night. I have learned not to plan the outcome of my prayers nor have and preconceived ideas of what the outcome should be. God works through me and for me when I am willing and open to any possibility.

Wow.

Lots of deep thinking from a little ole girl like me. I like to think of myself as a simple person. I strive to be simple. But I am not. I am in the process ( a very slow one) of getting back to the basics. The simple things make me happy. Talking to family or writing them a letter. Walks in the park. A motorcycle ride. A good book. A home cooked meal. Music. Flowers. yadda yaddda. This is coming from the gal who is typing all this in a blog.

I believe life is one big contradiction. What about you?

thoughts.............

So I am 30. I am working on becoming more spiritually fit. I am deciphering the direction I want to head in life. I am a recovering alcoholic. I try to do the person my fat little dog thinks I am.

Thats me. I very generic overview of the life I am currently living.

I have a GOD ( Good Orderly Direction ) in my life. If it feels right in my heart/gut I do it. If it doesnt I try not to do it. Sometimes my ego takes over and I think I am better than the higher power in my life and I try to fix things with out the guidance from above. That usually is not a pretty sight.

I bite off more thtn I can chew. I currently have about 4 major projects going. That doesnt include the numerous little ones.

But ya know what? I like myself today. I actually can look myself in the mirror and say that I love myself. I know that I am on the right path. Headed in the direction that I am supposed to be. Although at times I may not think the path is going the right way or fast enough. It is the right one for me. I have come along way. And have just as far to go.

Long over due...............

Ok. So here is the deal. I love reading other peoples blogs. I have a list that I check regularly. I get mad when they have nothing new. But. I do not ever update mine. Here is my newest mission. I vow to keep up on my blog.

Here goes.

Things I wonder:

• They say that you are attracted to your mate by smell. That when you meet them their smell will be perfect just to you. What if you meet them and your sinuses are plugged?

• I also wonder how is it that I cant make popcorn at home that tastes like movie theatre pop corn?

Oh well.